So I had a lunch meeting today at a local burger place. When I pulled up and parked my car, a homeless guy, clearly younger than me, approached my window. I’m not one to give these guys money as there are so many of them in my area, I’m afraid of a SUDDENLY, LAST SUMMER feeding frenzy. Like everybody else, I rarely have cash on me these days-and certainly not change-and I’m all too aware at how many of these guys are merely hustlers.
After our exchange, which left me feeling guilty, helpless, and useless, I decided to move my vehicle to a different spot and when I did, it simply died. I can’t find anyone to follow my towed car to a mechanic and give me a ride home so I’ve opted to leave my car at Lenny’s Burgers, and tow it later when I have some assistance.
My lunch date drove me home and sat with me a bit until I was calm and now I’m safely nestled in my air-conditioned home drinking a soothing hot cup of water-good for any stress-induced gallbladder attack (Google it). My cat Johnny is nearby giving himself a bath, purring up a storm, so all must be well.
I know in two hours my kid will be home to run these dreaded errands with me and I have friends who will later find their way to me as well. I have a handful of people I can call and I know that financially this will all work out.
Knowing that I was going to write a blog today inspired by the opening line of my song, LOVE ME FOREVER (available for free download @ www.paisleyyankolovich.com), I had already considered writing about the homeless-or whatever these challenging, lost souls are that have taken over all of my fast food establishments and convenience stores.
I had written LOVE ME FOREVER a long time ago when I was quite ill. The world around me (including family and friends) were convinced I had AIDS though that was not the case. Instead I had a 5 year battle with a weird cancer. God healed me and now I have a ministry because of it. That’s probably a way too simplistic account but it will have to suffice for now.
Prior to my healing, I learned what it was like to be shunned by practically everybody and when out in public, be treated like a freak-no, I was treated like leper, like I had The Plague. I wrote this song during that time and it has always stuck with me as not only a bitter remembrance of a crucible I’d prefer to forget, but as an anthem of perseverance and self-worth.
I know what it’s like to have people be afraid of me for something I had no control over. I know what it’s like to be abandoned because of it. I also know that the Lord was with me every minute of every day, comforting me and guiding me until I was on the other side of misery.
Today I am pressed to reflect on that period of my life in light of where my life is now. Today I seem to have family, friends, a church, co-workers, networkers and just plain folk who are around to lend a helping hand.
Yes, I had a rough start to my afternoon. And yes, it’s not over yet. But I am so aware that I’m not alone in my trial. I learned during those dark years that Jesus is always present even when no one else seems to be. Now it’s evident that I have the best of both worlds: Jesus and some pretty amazing human examples of His love and constant presence.
God bless the people that helped me through this day!