No one dropped in, waiting in despair

In 2009, when I was working on my record, LOVE ME FOREVER, I wanted to conclude it with something that mattered musically and culturally at that moment. A new duo from England called The Ting Tings were getting a lot of radio play in the States and I was thrilled when I heard their record to discover that all of their songs were catchy and clever-not just the radio hits.

Their song, WE STARTED NOTHING was a personal favorite, especially in that is was rather humor-free and spoke of responsibility in taking no responsibility, a non-choice that is a choice nonetheless. I recorded it as a secret track and personalized it to be, I STARTED NOTHING. It was quick, easy, fun and a fitting end to an oddball collection of songs that consisted of vocals juxtaposed against (sometimes seemingly random) noise.

LOVE ME FOREVER is one of my favorite creations and its final track, its most poignant.  Obviously when I recorded it I had no idea that a few short years later my beautiful son would be killed in an accident. Retroactively, I STARTED NOTHING is a tribute of sorts. It was the “now” sound of the moment and my son, a brilliant musician, was a big fan as well. We used to sing Ting Tings’ songs in the car and around the house, laughing all the way.

We had something in common.

And I now have a bittersweet memory.

In preparing for this blog, I purchased the Tings’ second CD (they currently have three available) to see if I would still enjoy them as much. I did. Refreshing, fun, retro, catchy and wildly distracting from the doldrums that can make up a day in the life, they immediately reminded me of my son. His energy, his humor, his smile, his laugh, his talent and his eye for a great song to learn all the words to so he could either impress his friends and family-or merely make them laugh.  (Don’t get me started on his legendary rendition of Black Eyed Peas’ HUMPS)

These are the precious discoveries along grief’s path that make it almost bearable to continue living without him. They are there for the times when no one drops in and I’m waiting in despair.